How does one honor Mother’s Day in a blog that focuses on negative thinking?

 

Well, I’ve been thinking about that and it can be done.  But it will require a journey back in time, a time in my early twenties. (I am 64 now so that’s 40 something years ago.  Can anyone really remember back that far?)

Like many 20 year olds I was straining at the bit to discover what I was to be doing with my life.  I had my own ideas about what I wanted to do and often those ideas were in direct conflict with my parent’s ideas.  But look, I was in my 20’s and I didn’t necessarily have to agree with my parent’s ideas, right?  I had the right to speak my mind for I was an adult, (that was my thinking).

It was during this ‘testing of my wings’ time that I began to experience conflict with my mother.  For she had ways that I was quite judgmental of, so now and then I would confront her about those.  (For they were quite irritating to me, you see)  As you might expect, those confrontations usually ended in tears and hurtful words.  Slowly, through my own misguided attempts to point out to my mom areas where I thought she needed to make some changes, a wall began to form.

Then at age 21 I had an encounter with God that dramatically transformed my thinking–especially about the conflict between my mother and me.

As I grew in my devotion to God, He helped me to understand and see my mother in a clearer light.  He pointed out to me that to honor Him I would need to honor my mother.  And one of the ways I could do that was to stop trying to conform her into an image of my own making.

I felt very strongly that God was pointing out to me back then to accept my mother just the way she was.  I was to resist any attempt to point out changes I felt she needed to make.  Slowly that wall that I had constructed between us began to crumble.

So what’s the connection between fiery darts and what took place in my life  over 40 years ago?

I now know that my thinking back then was characteristic of a fiery dart attack.  All those common sense thoughts that convinced me my mother needed to be corrected were fiery darts aimed at damaging the relationship between she and I.

But when I allowed God’s Word to influence my thinking then my actions and attitudes towards my mother became more accepting.  So much so that those things which use to irritate me simply didn’t bother me anymore.

Even though I wasn’t wise to the particulars of Satan’s scheme to attack me with fiery darts, God was.  And because I was so saturated with God’s Truths, I was able to benefit from the wisdom of those Truths as I applied them to the struggling relationship I had with my mother.

As I listened and learned from God how to honor and show respect for my mother, our relationship steadily improved.  Now that I’m 64 and my mother is 90, I find that my admiration for her continues to increase.  I’m convinced that the relationship we have enjoyed through the years since that time in my 20’s is the by-product of a mother who was faithful to love (and forgive) and a daughter who chose to cooperate with God as He taught her how to honor and respect her mother.

Years later, as I absorbed less and less of God’s Word, I unknowingly allowed Satan to set me on a path of destruction.  But the unfailing love of God intervened and well you can read all about my rescue in Fiery Darts: Satan’s Weapon of Choice.

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